When I was a kid, I was obsessed with a lot of Canadian movies, books, etc.  I've been trying to figure out why I was so obsessed.  I think that the movies and books had more fantasy.  There was one movie in particular called, "The Great Land of Small."  I would watch that movie hundreds of times and drive everyone in my house crazy singing the theme song.  Does anyone remember that movie? I swear, they don't make great movies like that anymore.  I kinda miss originality in films.

I was also obsessed with the Anne of Green Gables books and anything that Lucy M. Montgomery wrote.  Aww, Canada! It's too bad I've never been to visit.  Maybe one of these days.  I need to start writing my scripts and develop my own children stories.  Kids really don't know what they're missing because television, movies, and books just isn't what it use to be.  

Here's a clip of my favorite childhood film, The Great Land of Small.  Tell me what you think!

Today, I saw this woman smoking a cigarette and she appeared to be at least six months pregnant.  I seriously wanted to run up to her and snatch the cig out of her mouth.  I watched her in disbelief as she continued to drag on the cigarette--she didn't even let up for air.  Minutes later she put out the cigarette, and sat down next to me.  I know she noticed the judgmental look on my face.  I try not to judge but this time I couldn't hold back.  The messed up thing is that this wasn't the first time I witnessed a pregnant woman smoking a cigarette.  


Did she realize that the cigarette directly affects her unborn child? I guess she didn't care much.  Such a pain in the ass.  I wish I would have asked her reasons for smoking and purposely harming her child.  Why not just use protection? I really don't see the point of bringing a child into this world and being so careless.  I think I want to research this topic in more detail and this time find a pregnant woman who is willing to let me interview her.  Interesting topic.  


[Source via Google Images] 

Right now, I'm watching this movie on Lifetime called The Pregnancy Pact.  Although, the movie is fictional, it is inspired by true events.  Wow, this movie is making me think a lot about the unrealistic expectations that parents, churches, and society place on teens.  It's a sad day when teens can't have open communication with their parents and ask for condoms.  Beyond asking for condoms, teens should be able to have open dialogue with their parents, because that's the real issue.  Condoms and birth control definitely help, but without education and open discussions, it ain't going to help!

I also watched Bristol Palin on Oprah.  I listened as she confirmed her statement that, she will not have sex until marriage.  Really?!?! Oprah even gave her an opportunity to retract her statement.  Like Oprah said, who's to say that you'll meet that person, and even get married.  There are No guarantees.  That's definitely one way to look at it.  Don't get me wrong, abstinence is a great thing.  I use to say that I was going to abstain until marriage, but it didn't happen. 

The odds of an already sexually active teen abstaining until marriage is kinda slim, lets face it! But, that's just my opinion. 

The problem is, some parents worry so much about telling teens to wait 'til marriage until they have sex, and it's simply unrealistic.  When parents place these standards on teens, in my opinion, it isn't practical.  Yes, I grew up in a religious household, and I completely understand why parents and churches tell children to wait until marriage.  Sex can be risky, it comes with serious consequences, and there are also emotional factors of having sex too early (psychologically, it can be damaging), but the truth of the matter is that, children today are different than the children in the 1940s, 50s, or 60s.  The time period that our parents grew up in is not the same.  When our parents were younger, most of them married young.  Also, the ones that weren't married and having sex had a different level of responsibility.  This is not to make light of the sexually charged children in todays society, but there is a difference. 


Hell, I work in education, and the things that I hear children talk about is far more advanced from when I was in school.  This is only my opinion, so don't chew me out for expressing it.  I don't understand why parents get bent out of shape when schools recommend distributing condoms at school.

Condoms aren't the problem

The problem lies with children being misinformed, fearful to talk openly to parents, and the glorification of sex in the media.  With that said, I don't see these underlying issues changing anytime soon.  There is nothing wrong with saying to teens, "I would like for you to wait until marriage, but realistically speaking, it may not happen and in case you don't wait, here are condoms, please be safe, and talk to me if you have any questions." 

I remember attending school and unfortunately, Sex Education didn't offer much insight into sex.  Bottom line, I learned nothing in school about sex.   This is pretty sad considering the fact that I had sex education in elementary, middle school, and high school.  When I was in school, society was still in denial about children having sex so maybe that's why there wasn't a better platform. 

Don't get me wrong, my parents were open with me about sex.  However, I had friends who were far more advanced and were having sex.  I recall being in 7th grade and my classmate having to leave school because it was discovered that she was 5 months pregnant.  At the time, I didn't understand.  It wasn't until high school when I realized that most of the kids were having sex and some were rather promiscuous.  It was the secret in the community that no one wanted others to know.  Whenever I go back home to visit it's no surprise to me that those same girls who I attended high school with are 28 years old and have 12 year old children. 

What's my point?

Sex will not go away, and will not go away.  The fact of the matter is, it can't be swept under a rug.  Instead of constantly telling teens to NOT have sex until marriage, they should be told to ask questions, ask questions, and ask more questions.  In my opinion, children shouldn't be told NO if they need condoms, because it is more important for them to be educated and protected than uneducated and scared. 

I received a text message from a good friend the other day who was stressed over her big move coming up in March. 

Her message:

"I'm so stressed out about moving in with my friend in March."

"Why?" I asked her.

"Well, she has kids."

"I wouldn't do it," I told her.

Typically, I don't like to respond to people with "I wouldn't" or "If I were you," because I hate those responses.  I find it annoying and a complete disregard for the person's emotions (that's the future psychologist talking) however, I seriously wouldn't do it!

There is no way a fabulous 20-something woman should give up her freedom.  In my eyes it's like signing over your legal rights.  Don't get me wrong, I love children, but living with them is not an option.  Lifestyle wise and for sanity purposes.

"How old are they?"

"Their 6 and 7," she responded.

The fact that the kids are 6 and 7 makes me nervous.  In my head, I picture a scene from Yours Mine and Ours or whatever that movie was called with Dennis Quaid.  Food flying, kids screaming, sleep being disturbed, yeah, it's not the business.

"The problem living with kids is that you won't have any privacy, and probably won't get a lot of rest.  Think about it before you do it.  Don't move from one situation to another situation that's far worse," I told her.

If she could see my face, she would know that I was cringing the entire time that I was typing that message.  NO DON'T DO IT!!!!! I wanted to beam warning signs to her with a laser gun.  Do you think it would have helped?

"You can't find a roommate who doesn't have kids? Why are you stressed out about the situation?" I continued to ask more questions.

"I don't know how to tell her," she said. 

"Damn chica.  That's a difficult one because either way she's going to be upset that you agreed.  But a single girl living with a woman with kids is never a good situation."

I forgot to mention that, the woman she's thinking about moving in with is in her early 30's.  I'm sure she's probably cool, and tons of fun.  She probably use to get it back in her day.  Haha, I say that like she's a lot older than my age group.  She's not, but we all know two children and single is no joke.  She probably has to sacrifice much of her freedom. 

My advice to my friend was not to do it.  That's the only advice that I could give.

 What should my friend do? And, how does she break it to the potential roommate that she's no longer interested without hurting her feelings?